My Parenting Fails: Personal Freedom vs Peer Group Safety

Kids Playing
Being a parent is tough! After many years in the trenches (with many more to come!) I want to share one of the more difficult issues I have had to grapple with.

As parents we all want our children to grow up feeling loved, being educated and being physically fit among many other things. We also want our kids to make friends and develop good relationship skills. Finally most of us want our kids to be independent thinkers and learn to love and respect themselves despite the moods and criticisms of others.

In helping our children towards all these important goals, the tension between building their individuality and self-confidence, and navigating the dangers and social pressures of the playground can be quite problematic. [Read more…]

TMI? You Need A Low Information Diet!

TMI Info Overload

“There are many things of which a wise man might wish to be ignorant” Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Time wasted is gone forever” Jason Misso

TMI – Too Much Information OR is it Time to Minimise Information? A few weeks ago I was busy surfing the internet doing ‘research’ on social media strategy, twitter plug-ins, meme building apps, checking out the cool blogs of people I follow and impulsively watching the news every few hours and wondering why the same articles kept re-appearing – sound familiar? [Read more…]

After The Crisis: Helping The Helpers

Sunset

“Physician Heal Thyself” St. Luke 4:23

Like many people in the international community, I have been shocked by the public execution of several humanitarian aid workers in recent times. With the risk of being taken hostage whilst working to improve the lives of people in crisis, along with the myriad of other frontline risks they face, it is no wonder that many humanitarian aid workers leave the field, and are at such a high risk of psychological burnout and complex trauma.

In the history of the modern world, crises are a paradox – the source of much despair but simultaneously triggering amazing humanitarian support and compassion. Crises of hunger, war, natural disasters and disease have devastated entire nations and yet as many flee these challenges, there are inspiring people on the frontline who go and serve. [Read more…]

Wake Up Call: Stop Talking & Start Caring!

anger

“Actions speak louder than words…” Mark Twain

Have you ever had a ‘wake up call’ about how you live your life? I had one the other day – a moment where I suddenly got some deeper perspective about the difference between my daily hassles and first world problems and the much more profound problems many people face in their lives…

I was chatting with my friends over dinner one evening and the conversation topic was around defining moments in our lives. As we all spoke about different events that had shaped our lives my friend began telling me about an incident during his early twenties, which had left some deep emotional scars. [Read more…]

Resiliency for Leaders: Culture, Strategy & Skill Are Not Enough

anxietyHave you ever worked as a manager, supervisor or team leader? Have you ever had to manage staff who are not performing well or in conflict with other members of the team?

I was speaking with some friends recently who are management consultants that advise companies on leadership and strategy. The conversation focused on why organisations perform well. My friends believed  there were only three key factors that influenced this (1) the frontline manager’s leadership skills in managing their staff (2) the wider culture of the organisation, and (3) the ability to  execute strategy effectively. I disagreed with them as I believed there was something missing from their list….. [Read more…]

Burnout: For Love or Money?

Burnout Doctor“Love what you do and you will never work a day in your life” Unknown

It’s confession time… I have had a pretty major case of burnout in previous years – an experience which was really distressing at the time but taught me some powerful life lessons. [Read more…]

The Rescuer’s Dark Legacy

Rescuer Dark Legacy“Sometimes the Hero unwittingly ends up the Villain” – Simon Thatcher

Do you know someone who is a Compulsive Rescuer? Do you know someone who gets their thrills by helping people escape their (often self-inflicted) first world problems? If you took a good look at their inner circle of friends, are they the most stable and successful person?

Could that ‘someone you know’, really also be you at times?

If you answered “yes” to any of the above then read onwards my friend, for this should be of interest… [Read more…]

Family Indecision: NOT Deciding IS Deciding!

Frustration


‘Whilst I may not have the key to success, I do know that the key to failure is trying to please everybody’  

‘Does the dog wag the tail or is the tail actually wagging the dog?’ 

Has this ever happened to you?

Scene 1: You are having some family discussions about a forthcoming holiday and discussing a range of possible activities only to here your kids say “I don’t mind” or “Whatever”… You then go ahead and book the activities only to be told later – “I don’t want to do that activity…” Or worse, during the activity the kids are withdrawn and bored ruining it for everyone… [Read more…]

Difficult Conversations: Aggression, Manipulation & Emotion

Difficult Conversations 2Have you ever had to have a ‘Difficult Conversation’ with someone? Have you ever had to say ‘no’, set limits, or provide feedback about bad behaviour to someone at work, at home or in the community? The other day I had to provide some feedback to someone as part of conflict resolution in their workplace and they got really upset and started shouting and then subsequently complained about why their manager and peers had not given them feedback sooner….. [Read more…]

Family Values: Under Pressure & Celebrating Success!

IMG_5645“If you don’t stand for something you will fall for anything” Unknown

What are your family’s core values? What are the foundation stones, the key principles, the non-negotiables that provide a guiding light to show your family the way ahead when facing the challenging Waves of Life? [Read more…]